Hellguard's Argument
by M C Pehrson
Summary: Story #2: A brief dinner conversation between Spock and his friends stirs memories of his estranged child.


Jim Kirk had been more than a little surprised when he heard about it. Spock, on his own, attending a schoolgirl's graduation? It was not like the unemotional Vulcan to take an interest in any child. From McCoy, one might have expected some choice bit of sarcasm—but no. The doctor was strangely quiet as they sat across from one another, lingering over dessert and coffee in the officer's mess aboard the Enterprise.

McCoy eyed Kirk's banana cream pie with obvious disapproval. "I hope you know that's going straight to your waistline."

Kirk tugged self-consciously at his gold uniform tunic. "We're talking about Spock, not my weight. Don't you find his behavior the least bit peculiar?"

Polishing off his fruit cup, McCoy sat back and considered. "Let me get this straight. At our last layover—"

"Which Spock cleverly arranged," Kirk cut in.

McCoy started over. "At our last layover—which Spock cleverly arranged—Scotty was off visiting a cousin who teaches at some highbrow school. And lo and behold, Spock showed up at the graduation…out of uniform…and talkedto a kid with Vulcan ears. The kid's ears, that is. Well… _Spock's_ were pointy, too—do I have that much right?"

Kirk sighed. "She couldn't have been more than fourteen."

McCoy leaned toward him. "Jim…isn't that Spock's business?"

"Of course, but—"

A flash of blue appeared and there was Spock himself, dinner tray in hand.

As the Vulcan took a seat beside McCoy, he could not help noticing that the table conversation had ended rather too abruptly. Spock had scarcely begun eating his salad when he discovered why.

"So…Spock," Kirk said, drawing his words out in a peculiar manner, "on your shore leave. Did you run into anything…interesting?"

Spock chewed and swallowed before saying, "Anything or anyone, Captain?"

Kirk just looked at him. Finally he said, "…Anyone?"

Spock had glimpsed Mister Scott at the graduation. Apparently Scott had seen him, as well. "The girl's name," Spock divulged, "is Saavik."

Kirk's eyes widened. " _Whose_ name?" he asked with apparent innocence.

Spock wondered if he had leaped to a false conclusion and spoken too hastily. "Perhaps," he said, "I misinterpreted your question."

He maintained his silence for so long that Kirk finally gave up all pretense and admitted, "Someone saw you down there…at the school. Is Saavik a Vulcan name?"

"No," Spock replied and proceeded to tell them the story of how, years ago, he had joined the Vulcan exploratory expedition to Hellguard. Kirk and McCoy knew the planet's history, and that Vulcan had taken responsibility for the remnants of the colony abandoned by Romulans. Spock had argued long and hard for Vulcan's support, and ultimately won.

"There were children," Spock said.

"Yes," Kirk recalled. "Half-caste children roaming like animals. Products of forced interbreeding."

"With captured Vulcans," Spock reluctantly added.

In a quiet voice Kirk said, "Saavik…she was one of them?"

Spock nodded. "The fact that she refused a genetic test for the purpose of identifying her Vulcan parentage…piqued my interest. Since her rescue, she has lived off-planet, at the mercy of various benefactors. I was not pleased with her living arrangement, so this past year I assumed responsibility for her education and placed her in a suitable boarding school."

Kirk smiled and pushed away from the table. "Well, _that_ mystery's solved. You—involved with a kid. I _knew_ there had to be some good reason. Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me…"

For a moment Spock and McCoy sat side by side in awkward silence, remembering another child unrelated to Hellguard, but very much related to Spock.

Eyes strictly forward, McCoy finally said, "Spock…do you ever—"

Spock stiffened. "Please, Doctor." He did not care to discuss that other child, or even think of her.

McCoy rose, gathered his tray, and left.

Alone, Spock brought up a memory of Saavik as she had appeared on Hellguard—half wild, filthy, hungry. When he saw her at the graduation ceremony and later spoke to her—when he saw how far she had already progressed—it gave him hope that in another far-off colony named Ildarani, another mixed-breed girl would fair even better. Of course, _that_ one would be much younger. Walking now, learning to talk. Golden-haired and beautiful, like her mother. _What might her name be…?_

Abruptly he pushed the question aside and concentrated on finishing his meal. Was it prudent to have taken on young Saavik? She would be a constant reminder. He sometimes regretted the strange impulse that had made him seek out the sponsorship. Or was it really so strange, after all? Guilt was a powerful motivator. _Vulcans do not abandon their own offspring, however they were conceived._ So he had argued on Hellguard.

Once again, he was no longer thinking of Saavik.

Spock set down his fork and stared at it. He had lost his appetite.


End file.
